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We need better stories

There are many reasons we tell — and let ourselves believe — myths. As award-winning journalist Nesrine Malik writes in the prologue to the 2021 U.S. edition of her powerful first book We Need New Stories: The Myths that Subvert Freedom, a malignant thread made of myths has been running through Anglo-American history.

“These are not myths that animate believers into a shared sense of camaraderie and direction. They are myths that divide and instill a sense of superiority over others.”

As always, this Weekly Reader features links to recent books or articles that grabbed my interest or tickled my fancy.


Malik has produced an exceptional book that blends insightful analysis and reporting. Donald Trump’s ascension to the presidency in 2016 led her to write, but she notes that our myths have been in place long before Trump arrived. Instead of one single occurrence, our myths are a culmination of events.

Malik includes six chapters covering the most influential myths in America today, stories where “history, race, gender, and classical liberal values are being leveraged to halt any disruption of a centuries-old hierarchy that is paying dividends for fewer and fewer people.”

Sudanese-born and trained in the world of finance — where facts are important — Malik opens with an examination of academia, the publishing world, and the journalism industry in the “myth of the reliable narrator.” Unreliable narrators from those fields have fed us all the other myths and have remined closely aligned with power, generally without accountability.

That free thought is being sacrificed to oversensitivity to gender, race, and sexual orientation is one of the oldest of contemporary political myths, she states in the “myth of a political correctness crisis.” It “begins with a grievance creation, moves on to fabrication, and ends in diversion.” Like all the toxic myths that underpin our age of discontent, its starts with the premise that it’s all gone too far.

The “myth of the free speech crisis” is in reality seeking to make those on the right free from the consequences of their expression. In the “myth of harmful identity politics,” Malik points out that Brexit “Leavers” and Trump’s “left-behinders” are all demonstrating aggressive identity politics while mythologizing its harmfulness. This twisting of stories and negation of facts is only “nominally ideological,” as noted by one reviewer. “(M)oney and power usually lie at the heart of such scheming, and Trump’s rampant, transparent deceit is only the apotheosis of American’s long history of the grift.”

Many male progressive readers can absorb Malik’s work and nod approvingly, until faced with the penultimate chapter on the “myth of gender equality.” She puts this myth just before the conclusion because “it illustrates an important point — the enemies of change are not always obvious.”

“Whether it is political correctness, freedom of speech, or the whitewashing of history, these ideas are held widely in society and cut across political orientation, gender, and race. That’s what makes them so insidious. The myth of gender equality isn’t just propped up by cartoonish bad men who hoard the spoils of patriarchy. It’s held dearly by the ‘good’ men as well.”

Then Malik goes further.

“(W)hile men can embrace the need for efforts that lead to fairness, such as equal pay, they have a much harder time with their own loss of centrality. To these men, the end of the patriarchy is actually the end of the world.”

There is a lot of work for a man to do in self-reflection and the taking of responsibility for changing a system that he did not create. Many of us suffer from “privilege blindness,” where those who have enjoyed privilege confuse it with fairness. And yet, much as Heather McGhee has done with racism in The Sum of Us, Malik makes the strong case that “a system that is unfair to women results in its own injustices to men.” A “boomerang effect” is at play where myths are ultimately bad for everyone. A reviewer again notes that Malik breaks down the complex dynamics at hand “with efficiency — but also with wit, warmth, and charm.”

In her powerful conclusion, Malik writes that myths “work hard to prevent change from happening. They are powerful. But they are not all-powerful.” The strength of the myths is not in facts, but in the narratives, so it is impossible to fight fake facts with other facts. What is needed, Malik asserts, are new stories that are not just the correction of old stories, but are visions that assert that “for societies to evolve, an old order must change.”

We will get there.


Two articles which focus on harmful myths are also worth your consideration. Writing in The New York Times, journalist and author Anand Giridharadas takes on Warren Buffett and the Myth of the ‘Good Billionaire and notes that the “worst billionaires are the Good Billionaires. The sort who make it seem like the problem is the distortion of the system when, in fact, the problem is the system.” And Ed Ayers in Medium suggests that The Classroom is a Community of Trust, writing that “systemic racism is all too evident not only in the neighborhoods where (students) live, but in the very schools where they learn….Ignoring, denying, or raging at those facts does not make them go away. What it does do is make school irrelevant at best, and fraudulent at worst.”

More to come…

DJB

Image of Mount Rushmore by DJB.

I’d like to recommend…

When asked to serve as a reference, one of my mentors would respond, “I’ll be for you or against you, whichever helps the most.”

It is a good line and I’ve used it myself on occasion. One of the lessons this individual taught was how to put forward your thoughts in a way that has an impact.

I am not shy about giving recommendations and advice. This blog has recommended readings for books and recommend selections of music, although some may decide they don’t want musical advice from anyone who can recommend the ethereal VOCES8 version of Lully, Lulla, Lullay one week and Margo Price’s dark DUI ballad It Ain’t Drunk Driving if You’re Riding a Horse the next.

Recommendations tell us as much about the person making the suggestion as they do about the individual or thing being referenced. With that in mind, let’s consider integrity, bias, knowledge, and intent as important aspects of both the giving and receiving of recommendations.

Your word is all you have

Early in my professional career, I had a bad experience that shaped my thinking on recommendations of all types. After receiving a strong reference from an applicant’s most recent employer, I hired that individual only to find they were not up to the job. I subsequently discovered that the former employer had actually let this person go as well.

The integrity of your word can be so easily lost when you make a recommendation that does not align with the truth or your experience. With referrals, one can demur or highlight both strengths and weaknesses in order to ensure that your references are made with integrity.

And if you decide to include someone as a reference on a job application, common courtesy and common sense suggest you first ask their permission.

Watch your bias

Job referrals are, of course, a more serious topic than my book or music reviews. Let’s admit up front that some groups are especially privileged when it comes to professional references. Women and people of color in general have been badly served through the decades by hiring practices that sought out applicants who looked, thought, and behaved just like the overwhelmingly male and white hiring managers. Through the years I came to realize this pattern of injustice, but reflect on my own role without much pride. I worked to change, but was clearly a latecomer to the process.

Consider the source

When my grandmother would hear something that sounded off, she would say “consider the source.” That’s good advice when pondering any recommendation or referral. When we solicit recommendations and thoughts only from people in our circle of acquaintances, we often forget this counsel and overlook their lack of expertise on a subject simply because we know them. That can easily lead straight down the good-old-boy-network rabbit hole and of hearing just what you want to hear. We can all do better in checking sources that go beyond our personal electronic rolodex and our level of comfort.

When we seek out a referral from someone we don’t know, it should push us to research that individual to determine what she knows, appreciates, and has accomplished, just as we should see if the book reviewer who takes a strong stand for a new work has experiences that would lead us to trust his judgement.

Check your motive

In an earlier post on feedback, I suggested that one should stop to think about why you believe it is important for you to impart some of your wisdom on another person. When our advice comes “free of charge,” we may believe we have the best of intentions. The one receiving the input may have an entirely different take on the conversation. 

When at my best, I work to consider the other person in both professional and personal situations. Will this position be a good fit? Will this book have meaning to others? When a long-time and very thoughtful friend told me that her husband was reading Democracy in Chains based on my online recommendation, I felt secure that I had fairly conveyed its value and that my motive was clear. After slogging through the occasional dud of a book, I generally don’t post a review. On the other hand, my Weekly Reader and Saturday Soundtrack sections have an aura of “buyer beware” that floats over those offerings. They won’t be everyone’s cup of tea.

Recommendations are one way we represent our standards and values to others. Don’t be afraid to tell me what you think, but make it clear and reflective of who you are. If you happen to be a bluegrass-loving, classical music fan, I’ll think you’re amazingly open-minded. But then, as grandmother would say, consider the source!

More to come…

DJB

Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

Tim O’Brien helps us work through these trying times

Long among my favorites, singer, songwriter, and multi-instrumentalist Tim O’Brien is a mainstay on the acoustic, bluegrass, and roots music scene. This Saturday Soundtrack celebrates the music and ongoing influence of this talented performer.

Born in Wheeling, WV in 1954, O’Brien first came to prominence with the bluegrass band Hot Rize which played regularly from 1978 to 1990, was resurrected in 2014, and which continues to have an outsized influence on the acoustic music world.

“Steeped in bluegrass tradition…Hot Rize’s music was and is equally informed by a taste for the music of Leadbelly and Freddie King, swing, old-time Appalachia and more in ways that mirror the broad sweep of Bill Monroe’s influences.“

From the band’s 40th anniversary bash — joined by friends Sam Bush, Jerry Douglas, and Stuart Duncan — Hot Rize performs Radio Boogie with O’Brien on the lead vocals.

Like many of us, O’Brien listened to a wide range of music growing up. And then he heard Doc Watson.

“O’Brien…absorbed a broad range of American music growing up, from country and rockabilly icons like Jerry Reed and Jerry Lee Lewis backed by local ringers at the famous Grand Ole Opry-style Wheeling Radio Jamboree to Duke Ellington, Count Basie and Dave Brubeck at summer concerts in the park. His parents had season tickets to the Wheeling Symphony and brought along the young O’Brien and his sister Mollie, who would become his first band mate; they also saw Ray Charles and the Beatles when they came through town. O’Brien took it all in, but something clicked when he first caught Doc Watson on TV as a teenager: that versatility, and the distillation of so much into the framework of traditional sounds, would be one of his biggest inspirations. ‘Doc Watson’s a great roadmap for anybody, really, because he played all kinds of music and made it sound like Doc Watson music,’ said O’Brien. ‘Of course, people put him in a bluegrass-folk music pigeonhole, but he really brought all of it together, and that’s kind of what I was interested in.'” 

One of the loveliest remembrances of Doc Watson was one O’Brien recorded at the Kennedy Center shortly after Doc’s death.

O'Brien and Scott 07 12 14

After Hot Rize retired from the road, O’Brien became a sought after session musician; a songwriter with hits covered by Kathy Mattea, Garth Brooks and the Chicks; and a musical collaborator with a range of talented individuals including Darrell Scott. Always ready to use music to make a point, Keep Your Dirty Lights On is about mountaintop removal, something very important to two men from West Virginia and Kentucky.

“If you’ve got money in your pocket and a switch on the wall / we’ll keep your dirty lights on.”

One of my favorite O’Brien albums is 1996’s Red on Blond, featuring string band covers of Bob Dylan songs. This live version of Tombstone Blues, played with an all-star band, burns down the house! The O’Brien version of Maggie’s Farm is also a stellar remake of a Dylan classic.

O’Brien has always enjoyed exploring his Irish heritage as found on both sides of the Atlantic in albums such as The Crossing and Fiddler’s Green. From that second album, Look Down that Lonesome Road, heard here with a Transatlantic band, is a good example of this part of his catalog.

During the pandemic, O’Brien joined a group of Nashville pickers to back up Sturgill Simpson in his hit two-volume bluegrass album Cuttin’ Grass.

O’Brien has a new album coming out this month entitled He Walked On. It is a deeply personal look at getting through our trying times.

“‘He Walked On’ is an expansive portrayal of the nation from its beginnings to the present day through a series of musical snapshots, each training its lens from a different angle: humor, humanity, solidarity, grace. The Latin-tinged “El Comedor,” co-written with O’Brien’s fiancée Jan Fabricius, reflects on time the couple spent last year at the Mexican border near Tucson, visiting with a grassroots humanitarian group that offered water and food to hopeful immigrants waiting for asylum. With ‘We’re In The Same Boat, Brother,’ written by ‘Brother, Can You Spare A Dime’ lyricist Yip Harburg, O’Brien reaches back nearly 80 years for a call to solidarity that still feels timely today.“

That’s How Every Empire Falls is also from He Walked On, and here O’Brien is not only covering an important tune for our times, but he is also recognizing his friend, the late John Prine, who had a famous cover of this song.

The Tim O’Brien Band is on tour this summer. They’ll be in Baltimore on July 9th and at the Red Wing Roots Music Festival in Mount Solon, VA on July 10th, before heading out to Colorado.

Catch some live music and enjoy!

More to come…
DJB

Image at top of post from Tim O’Brien | Howdy Skies! (timobrien.net)

Would you like to improve your life?

Would you like to improve your life? Lucky you…because you’ve come to the right place!

As always, this Weekly Reader features links to recent articles that grabbed my interest or tickled my fancy. I hope you find something that makes you laugh, think, or cry.


Author and executive coach Brad Stulberg has thoughts on how to make that improvement real, which you can find on getpocket.com with 8 Rules to Do Everything Better.

All eight have something to offer, but I found this one especially helpful.

“Make the Hard Thing Easier — Willpower is overrated. Rather than relying completely on self-control, intentionally design your environment to make the hard thing easier. For example, if you (like everyone) are constantly distracted by your smartphone, don’t just turn it off — remove it altogether from where you’re trying to concentrate. If your challenge is eating healthy, instead of relying on your willpower at 9 p.m. after a glass of wine, simply keep the brownies out of the house. This applies to everything. Don’t just think about how you’re going to accomplish your goals; think about how you’re going to design for them.“


Cal Newport writing on his Study Hacks blog, quotes C.S. Lewis during World War II in suggesting that if you want to improve your life, get on with it because Favorable Conditions Never Come.

“We are always falling in love or quarreling, looking for jobs or fearing to lose them, getting ill and recovering, following public affairs. If we let ourselves, we shall always be waiting for some distraction or other to end before we can really get down to our work. The only people who achieve much are those who want knowledge so badly that they seek it while the conditions are still unfavorable. Favorable conditions never come.”


Julie Danielson (a.k.a. Jules) from my hometown of Murfreesboro, Tennessee, had a wonderful chat with illustrator Mike Wohnoutka of the children’s book How to Apologize by David LaRochelle on her blog Seven Impossible Things Before Breakfast. Of course, knowing how to apologize is a skill that we can all work on to improve our life!

“Wouldn’t the world be a better place if everyone knew how to apologize? Luckily, this humorous guidebook is full of practical tips about when, why, and how to say you’re sorry. From a porcupine who accidentally popped his friend’s balloon to a snail who was running so fast he stepped on a sloth’s toes, hilarious examples and sweet illustrations abound. For both listeners who are just learning and older readers who need a refresher, this book will come as a welcome reminder that even though apologizing can be hard, it doesn’t have to be complicated.“


Finally (he says to himself), stop writing such long emails! The Philadelphia Inquirer’s Angry Grammarian has a tip to help in The bigger the boss, the shorter your emails should be.

“After the Modern American Empire falls to the People’s Republic of China, and the Chinese Communist Party wields control of our country from sea to shining sea, we’ll only have ourselves to blame — and our adjectives.

Last month, China took a great leap forward. The Washington Post recently reported that Ren Zhengfei, founder and CEO of Huawei, told the company’s 197,000 employees to write shorter memos with fewer adjectives. At the world’s 49th-largest company, concise writing is now corporate dictum.

Excuse me while I go buy a plane ticket.“

Ren believes that his employees’ writing needs more discipline. Yes, I resemble that remark. Time to cut some adjectives.

Have a good week.

More to come…

DJB

We truly do need each other

An oft-heard response to calls for addressing the impacts of inequality is that slavery and racial segregation have ended, things have reverted to some benign mean, so “now we must all stop asking for special dispensation.”*

In her vital and hopeful book The Sum of Us: What Racism Costs Everyone and How We Can Prosper Together, Heather McGhee begins by addressing the argument that whites today have not benefited from historical inequalities. She shows how many programs meant to build a strong middle class were actually designed to build a strong white middle class.

  • The Homestead Act of 1862 was a free grant of 160 acres of land, where some 1.6 million landowners gained deeds. Only six thousand Black families were able to participate. Today an estimated 46 million people — the overwhelming majority white — are propertied descendants of Homestead Act beneficiaries.
  • During the Great Depression, the government insured mortgages on real estate and offered tax deductions on interest, creating a new class of homeowners. But the government drew red “do not lend” lines around virtually all Black neighborhoods, excluding them from this benefit.
  • The New Deal brought minimum wage and overtime laws that transformed the lives of workers. Compromises with southern Democrats excluded the job categories held by most Blacks.
  • The GI Bill paid the college tuition of hundreds of thousands of WWII veterans — including my father — “catapulting a generation of men into professional careers.” But local administrators funneled Black servicemen to segregated vocational schools, when they could get the benefits at all.
  • From the creation of white suburbs through the use of highway construction dollars and subsidized housing to Social Security benefits that excluded job categories where most of the workers were Black, many government policies “worked to ensure a large, secure, and white middle class.”

“The advantages white people had accumulated were free and usually invisible and so conferred an elevated status that seemed natural and almost innate. White society had repeatedly denied people of color economic benefits on the premise that they were inferior; those unequal benefits then reified the hierarchy, making whites actually economically superior.”

This is where McGhee’s groundbreaking work makes its key point. These programs had worked. Spectacularly well in many cases. But when faced with sharing those benefits and the same treatment from the government with people of color, white Americans — to use an old adage — decided to cut off their nose to spite their face.

McGhee has a better metaphor: they drained the swimming pool.

As one telling example, white communities decided to drain their beautiful public swimming pools in the 1950s and 1960s rather than share them with Black people. More than a thousand public pools were closed due to racial hatred, and “millions of white Americans who once swam in public for free began to pay rather than swim for free with Black people.” In the 1990s, my children learned to swim in a private neighborhood pool. Now integrated for those who can afford the fee, it nonetheless was part of this historic shift.

By advancing a zero-sum economic model — where if you win, then I lose — those with power and wealth have hollowed out public goods and denigrated government programs that were once supported by wide majorities of Americans. McGhee explains how that campaign has hurt us all. Let’s be clear: people of color have suffered disproportionately from racism. But there is also a financial cost — as well as what writer Wendell Berry calls a deep, hidden moral cost — of racism to white Americans.

McGhee is hopeful as she suggests we have “reached the productive and moral limit of the zero-sum economic model.” She appeals to concrete self-interest in order to show how our fortunes are tied up with the fortunes of others. “We suffer because our society was raised deficient in social solidarity,” she writes. In example-after-example she points toward the benefits to whites and people of color from a Solidarity Dividend that helps us refill the pool of public goods for everyone.

“(W)e’ve got to get on the same page before we can turn it. We’ve tried a do-it-yourself approach to writing the racial narrative about America, but the forces selling denial, ignorance, and projection have succeeded in robbing us of our own shared history — both the pain and the resilience. It’s time to tell the truth, with a nationwide process that enrolls all of us in setting the facts straight so that we can move forward with a new story, together.”

This is a remarkable book written with striking clarity and deep kindness. It is worth your while as a key piece in understanding the puzzle of our current moment and our potential pathway forward.

More to come…

DJB

*From Nestine Malik’s book We Need New Stories.

Image: Photo montage by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay.

Frank Solivan and Dirty Kitchen offer bluegrass food for the soul

As music festivals begin to return this summer, let’s take a Saturday Soundtrack look at one of the favorites of the bluegrass circuit: Frank Solivan and Dirty Kitchen.

About that band name. Solivan is a gourmet chef, and he often prepared meals for friends and — on occasion — for the fans who came to his shows. Thus the “dirty kitchen” moniker (although he makes the point that he always cooks in clean kitchens).

Solivan is from California and spent time in Alaska as the first chair violin in the University of Alaska orchestra. From there he joined the Navy’s service band, Country Current, where he played electric guitar in their country outfit and mandolin and fiddle in the bluegrass unit. After that gig, Solivan formed his current band, which has won numerous awards and world-wide acclaim.

Frank Solivan at Cedar Lane

Having heard this band live three or four times, I can attest to the fact that their instrumental chops are superb. Solivan handles the lead vocals, mandolin, and fiddle. IBMA 2013 Banjo Player of the year Mike Munford plays fluid, other-worldly melodies on the five-string. IBMA 2013 Momentum Award winner Chris Luquette holds down the guitar chair, moving between traditional flatpicking and jazzier stylings. Jeremy Middleton provides the foundation for the band on the bass.

To showcase those instrumental chops, we’ll begin with M80, a tune Munford named for a firecracker after he spent a July 4th night on the national mall. While there are live examples on YouTube, I like the original from the On the Edge album because of the stellar dobro work Rob Ickes brings to the tune.

On the Edge was the breakthrough album for the Dirty Kitchen band, and it was their first on Compass Records. The album begins with some classic bluegrass with I Fell Short (on Standing Tall). Check out the nice interplay halfway through between Solivan and Munford.

But that classic bluegrass sound soon takes a diversion into 1960s rock…with the Box Tops!

If the Box Tops don’t rock you, how about some Roy Orbison…with a little Day Tripper thrown in for good measure. Munford’s break on Pretty Woman, from the Family, Friends, and Heroes album, is a gem.

The follow-up album to On the Edge was Cold Spell, which includes the tongue twister She Said She Will. It features great breaks by Luquette and Munford.

In a nice juxtaposition of desires, the music video for Crave, the first tune from 2019’s If You Can’t Stand the Heat, was filmed amidst the beautiful instruments of Carter Vintage Guitars in Nashville. Yes, so many gorgeous instruments…so little money.

Frank Solivan and Chris Luquette

And if you think The Letter was a one-off, well…you clearly haven’t heard the bluegrass version of Whipping Post!

(Yes, yes…I know that you can’t do Whipping Post better than the Allman Brothers Band…whether with Duane and Dickey or Derek and Warren. So don’t troll me. The solo by Derek Trucks is insane!)

Let’s end this Soundtrack where we began, with a great Mike Munford instrumental, Line Drive.

Frank Solivan and Dirty Kitchen are playing in the Maryland area (and around the country) this summer, so catch them — or your favorite band — and enjoy some live music!

More to come…

DJB

Images of Frank Solivan and Dirty Kitchen by DJB

Just don’t make things worse

“The first rule of holes, goes the adage, is that ‘if you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.'”

In a week with some personal challenges and anxieties, I needed to read those words this morning from Ryan Holiday’s The Daily Stoic: 366 Meditations on Wisdom, Perseverance, and the Art of Living.

Today’s offering was entitled “Just don’t make things worse.” After a rather stiff and formal quote from the Meditations of Marcus Aurelius, Holiday begins with that opening line above, and then continues.

“This might be the most violated piece of commonsense wisdom in the world. Because what most of us do when something happens, goes wrong, or is inflicted on us is make it worse — first, by getting angry or feeling aggrieved, and next, by flailing around before we have much in the way of a plan.

Today, give yourself the most simple and doable of tasks: just don’t make stuff worse. Whatever happens, don’t add angry or negative emotions to the equation. Don’t react for the sake of reacting. Leave it as it is. Stop digging. Then plan your way out.”

Reminders worth repeating. Don’t add negative emotions to the equation. Stop digging. Plan your way out.

It is no coincidence that these were words I needed to hear. Perhaps they will resonate with you.

Have a good day.

More to come…

DJB

Image by Alexei Chizhov from Pixabay

Weekly Reader: Fun and games

Baseball is famous for having “unwritten rules” that are mostly there so that old men (white and black) can complain about the younger generation (black, brown, and white). Eli Grober explores this phenomena in McSweeney’s The Completely Normal, Totally Reasonable Unwritten Rules of Baseball.

As always, this Weekly Reader features links to recent articles that grabbed my interest or tickled my fancy. I hope you find something that makes you laugh, think, or cry.


Grober begins with the set-up:

“’We were taught from day one to respect the game, respect the competition, respect the opponent… You don’t swing 3-0 when you’re up by that big a lead.’ — White Sox manager Tony La Russa, expressing disappointment in star rookie Yermin Mercedes for hitting a home run when his team was winning, 5/18/21“

And then he helps explain it all for you by writing out those unwritten rules, beginning with Rule #1:

“If a team is down by a lot of runs, they should stop trying to win. And the other team should stop trying to score. And the fans should fall into a deep, awful sleep….

We’ll be back in a minute to Rule #8:

“Don’t do anything new….If you figure out a novel way to score or win or whatever, you’re just making everyone who used to play and never thought to do that feel bad.“

And finally, Rule #10:

“If a player breaks any one of these rules, someone else should throw a hard baseball 90 miles per hour at their head. This is completely reasonable and totally normal.“


Javy Báez DEFINITELY violated Rule #8 last week.

With two outs, the first baseman simply had to touch the bag for the inning to end. Instead, he had a brain lock when the baserunner began running BACKWARDS! However, if he had tagged Báez BEFORE he reached first — even after the runner touched home — the inning would have been over and the run would not have counted.

But he didn’t. This became many fans’ instant candidate for wackiest baseball play ever. It shows the value of perseverance: don’t ever stop trying, because you never know when the other guy’s brain will lock up.

Every time I go to the ballpark I see something I’ve never seen before. This definitely qualifies.


“The world of sports media is basically where American men go to avoid therapy, where they can project their wounds and failings onto strangers and referees,” writes Sam Anderson in an insightful piece in the New York Times Magazine. Kevin Durant and (Possibly) the Greatest Basketball Team of All Time is full of gems about this most graceful of players and the changing nature of the NBA.

With superteams constructed largely by the best players the changes to the game haven’t been well received by some fans. LeBron James started this trend with his “decision” to “take my talents to South Beach” from Cleveland.

“This inspired exactly the kind of panic you might expect in certain quarters of America, given the racial dynamics involved: a redistribution of power from (mostly) old white executives to (mostly) young black players.“

After playing with his original team, the Oklahoma City Thunder, for longer than most superstars, Durant decided to test the free agent market in 2016.

“He conducted his free agency like the superstar that he was: He rented a mansion in the Hamptons, where he hosted waves of N.B.A. suitors…in the end, Durant made a choice that just about ripped the basketball world in half. He left OKC to join the Golden State Warriors, the best team in the league, one of the greatest teams in history and the team that just barely knocked the Thunder out of the playoffs five weeks earlier. It would have been like Jimi Hendrix, after narrowly losing a battle of the bands to the Rolling Stones, signing on as their new lead guitarist. To many sports fans, Durant, like LeBron James before him, became an absolute villain. He had taken player empowerment too far, critics said, violated a sacred code of competitive pride. Also, he hurt their feelings. ESPN’s most famous bloviator, Stephen A. Smith, called it ‘the weakest move I’ve ever seen from a superstar.’”

Calling out Stephen A. as a bloviator won me over. If you can get past the paywall, this long piece is worth the read.

Enjoy your summer fun and games!

More to come…

DJB

Image by Anja from Pixabay.

NOTE: This post originally began with the Durant piece in the lead, but after major injuries to Harden and Irving, the Nets lost in the Eastern Conference semifinal, making this much less relevant. So I moved the baseball stories to the top.

Power that builds rather than divides

Recently, while considering ways to use focus to enrich my life, another f-word kept appearing in the works I was reading: forgiveness.* Being better at focusing than forgiving, I suspect this is no coincidence.

These thoughts on forgiveness began to take shape following another mass shooting. My friend and mentor Frank Wade wrote about this intractable yet solvable fact of life in America back in 1999 after the Columbine High School massacre:

“Problems among people are solved by forgiveness, not force. It is generosity that heals and cleanses, not genocide. Mutual hope is what makes us safe. Trust is what we need, and we will never, ever get it through triumph in any form.“

In 50 very short rules for a good life, number 34 is: forgive, forgive, forgive. The repetition suggests we should apply it on a daily basis.

These two passages from different traditions spurred the thought that perhaps we do not conceive of forgiveness as a solution for horrific tragedies such as mass shootings because we so seldom consider forgiveness as part of our response to the challenges in our day-to-day lives.

In a recent article on memoir writing, Lisa Cooper Ellison begins with a story where a writing instructor asked the students to bring in a scene from their memoir-in-progress that included the character who challenged them the most. The scene Ellison chose could’ve been titled “The Reason I Hate My Mother.” As Ellison read the assignment on the board she saw:

“Write the scene from your antagonist’s perspective.“

Ellison bit the inside of her cheek to keep from saying, “Do you know what she’s effing done?” In too many of life’s troubled experiences, that’s our response: do you know how I’ve been hurt? By this jerk?! And I’m suppose to forgive them?!!

In my experience, forgiveness, like focus, is hard and requires bravery.

It is hard in part because we misunderstand it, assuming that when we forgive we bury our feelings, forget what happened, and stay friends with one who has hurt us. It requires bravery because it is far easier to have a rehearsed story that may begin with “let me tell you what he did” and inevitably produces gasps from friends. Those rehearsed stories are usually “what forgiveness specialist Fred Luskin calls a grievance story.” While the responses Ellison received to her rehearsed story were highly satisfying, each rendition kept her in the role of victim without any power.

Grievances, like force, never solve problems among people. We don’t understand that forgiveness empowers. We should forgive because it is only then that our personal healing can begin.

And we should forgive even if the other person is not ready to receive it.

I can think of no better example of forgiving even when the recipient is not prepared to be forgiven than one we saw in 2015. A 21-year-old white supremacist had just murdered nine innocent people in a venerable Black church in Charleston. Time and again at the bail hearing, the family members of those murdered simply said, “I forgive you” to the angry young man who found it appropriate to kill their mothers, aunts, brothers, and children because he — in his own misguided way and spurred by the hatred so often found in our public discourse — felt his world was threatened. It was a moving and deep faith-based response in contrast to those who quickly call for violence as a response to violence.

When painful events hold power over us, we give in to the mythologies of separation and violence. When that power overtakes me, I am certain about how things really happened, limiting the frames by which I see the world.

Forgiveness not only helps us write a better memoir, it gives us a power that is stronger than the power of hate. A power that builds instead of divides and denies.

In the midst of growing grievance fueled by those who benefit from our isolation, it is time to give forgiveness a chance to demonstrate its power in the world.

More to come…

DJB

*What? Your mind went elsewhere? I forgive you. Hat tip to Lisa Ellison for the idea.

Photo by Sergey Pesterev on Unsplash

Charlie Rauh and the case for playing soft and slow

Guitarist Charlie Rauh, — featured in this week’s Saturday Soundtrack — grew up in Huntsville, Alabama and now lives in New York City. Rauh began playing clarinet and saxophone at age 13, and then began to learn the guitar. “Playing guitar really opened up a lot of creative momentum for me,” Rauh notes, “as I could play chords as well as melodies and form more developed ideas. I was (and still am) very influenced by Duke Ellington. I’d say that he and his music first inspired me to want to be a composer due to his wonderfully lyrical melodic sense intertwined with dense, idiosyncratic harmony.”

Rauh’s quiet but moving solo guitar work, inspired “from folk lullabies, plainchant, and the imagery of various poets ranging from the Brontës to Anna Akhmatova,” is a balm for the soul.

“Acoustic Guitar Magazine notes that ‘Charlie Rauh plays guitar with a quiet intensity, each note and chord ringing with purpose…With these lullabies Rauh gives a gentle reminder that playing soft and slow can be more impactful than loud and fast.'”

To demonstrate that soft and slow compositional style, this first video is of Rauh playing his original composition Arolen from the 2017 release Viriditas. For the guitar geeks reading, Rauh is playing a Waterloo WL-14. The song was named after the street Rauh grew up on in Huntsville and contains the melody from his first “song” written as a child.

Ethereal Lullabies is another gorgeous composition from Rauh, played on a small Collings guitar.

The Fretboard Journal posted a recent video of Rauh, and because this is the Fretboard Journal, they tell you more about the guitar than the composition. Both are lovely.

“The song is ‘Watch Through the Darkest Hours of Night,’ from the album ‘The Bluebell,’ on Destiny Records. The guitar is a custom Collings Parlor he recently acquired — it’s essentially a Parlor 1 T (Mahogany back and sides, Sitka spruce top), with a satin finish, no fretboard markers, ivoroid trim (bindings, tuners, bridge pins and logo) and no endpin.“

I’ll end this Soundtrack with two duets, the first an improvisation with Rauh and Mark Goldenberg where together they weave some beautiful strands of sound. The second is a special duo arrangement of Rauh’s song, Observer, with Eric Skye (previously featured on Saturday Soundtrack). The original solo version was recorded on Rauh’s album, Hiraeth. The two musicians — obvious aficionados of the luscious sounds they can coax from the small-bodied guitar — pair nicely on this tune.

Playing soft and slow is beautiful. Enjoy!

More to come…

DJB

Image: Charlie Rauh by Liz Maney (credit: PHOTOS — Charlie Rauh)